Chapel of Love

Gooooooing to the chapel and we're gonna get maaaaaaried. - The Dixie Cups

I've been having wedding dreams lately. Like...my wedding. Can't see the bride, but I see the dress. Can't see faces of the bridesmaids, but they're all in dresses. I see my groomsmen, the minister, everything else...but none of the women in the bridal party. I'm not gonna lie, it's kind of annoying. I have so many things I want to have for my wedding, ideas on how to propose, what I want the "Wedding Day Prep" playlist to look like, all of that. Just need the bride. 

I've decided something about myself: Me (eventually) being happy and in a healthy relationship with someone else? Will only actually happen if I'm being happy and in a healthy relationship with...myself. I have to remember that even when my DAY isn't going well, my LIFE is good. There will be days when I'll have to find my own happiness, and that's okay. Life will always be good. This may sound lame to you, whoever is reading this, but so far? It's been helping me. So I'm gonna keep doing it...man.

There really isn't going to be a clear and concise ending to this. No loose ends will be tied up. And I would apologize, but no one reads this, soooo...prolly fine. :)

P.S. Did you guys know that The Dixie Cups were black??

Hey Beautiful

"Ba ba BA baaa ba ba ba baaaaaa dada da dadada da dadada daaaaaaa" - The Solids

If you know me, you know I'm slightly obsessed with a few things:

1...and 2) Friends (Both the real life ones, and the ones on that AWESOME TV show)
3) HIMYM
4) Music
5) Things that are both funny and fun.

Today, kids, we're going to talk about the 3rd. How I Met Your Mother. HIMYM, for short. In case you were unaware, the little intro song? IS A REAL SONG! I LITERALLY just learned this. And I kinda dig it! The song is call "Hey Beautiful", by The Solids. I would say "Check it out", but I'm gonna post it here because easy.

Anyway, the real blog post starts now:

What I've Learned From Watching HIMYM...Again

My sister got married a few months ago. I'm the only one of the siblings that's still single. Not a fan of that...or having been reminded of it seven times during the wedding/reception, but that's neither here nor there. That night, after the reception was over, I headed back to my place, and decided to rewatch How I Met Your Mother. For probably the 5th time. I finished season 7 tonight, which means I'm all caught up (as far as I've watched, at least). I've realized something: I'm turning into Ted Mosby. I've gone back and forth on the whole "I want a wife and kids" thing for years now. The older I get, the more I really do want it. However, ever time I go out searching for "the one", I get dumped on.

I went on a blind date not too long ago. It was my first date in 8 years. The last one, oddly enough, was also a blind date. Anyway, I thought we were having a decent, if not a good, time. Until I realized: She was looking at her phone almost the whole time we were together. She then told the person who set us up that there was no chemistry.
I'm sorry...what? How can we even ATTEMPT chemistry when you're looking at your phone for 97% of our date? Come on. Pissed me off...

Since the Blind Date iPhone Debacle, I've joined eHarmony. They offered me a killer deal on membership, and I took it. I have started communicating with people who, according to Dr. Neil Clark Warren, are nearly perfectly compatible with me. I have sent 7 messages to ladies all over the US. 5 of those ladies...have now become "hidden matches". I'm pretty sure that means they said "Hahahaha no. Loser", and made it so I never talk to them again. Not gonna lie, kinda hurts my feelings. But what can ya do? Well, I'm choosing to listen to my friend Dory. She told me to just keep swimming. So? I keep looking. Keep sending messages. Keep getting rejected. You know why? Because one day, I'm gonna find her. Either that? Or I'll be that cool guy with all the snakes. Or dogs. Or something. But not cats. Never cats.

Tell Me Lies

"Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies. (Tell me liiieeessss) Tell me tell me lies!" - Fleetwood Mac

When I was in high school, I had a friend. A BEST friend even. [Good for you, Kevin. Good for you.] One of the new people that (I thought) I could trust. With anything. People like that are great to have in your life, right? Yeah...you'd think.

One day, we were working on something at my house, and he had his email open. He asked me to look something up for him, so I did. I happened to glance at the subject of an email that had been sent. It was my name. He was telling the girl I had, moments earlier, confessed my interest in, not to worry about my liking her because I was gay.

*Pause*

*Pause*

*Pause*

WHAT?

OK, let's be honest: That wasn't a new thing for people to be saying about me. I've never had anyone ask if it's true before spreading that rumor, but still. Nothing new. Anyway. This dude is supposed to be my best friend, he's not supposed to be talking crap about me behind my back! I let it sink in for a moment. Thought about it. Didn't say anything to him. Why bring it up?

A few weeks later, I was just having a bad day. So I did end up saying something to him. And guess what he did? He said to me "I never said that..."

What happened next is even worse, and why I've decided high school K Fend was an idiot. I said "OK, just wanted to check.", and we hugged it out. I'll allow that to sink in for you. Yeah. I SAW it, and still believed him when he said he didn't send it. Say it with me: You, sir, are an idiot.

I've been replaying this whole thing in my head all day. Why didn't I say "Dude, check your email. I CAN read, you know."? Why didn't I beat the crap out of him? Why didn't I just cut my losses and stop talking to him? I have a theory on this. High school is an awful, awful time. We're always trying to find ourselves. To fit in. Be a part of something. My then friend was a golden boy. Everyone knew him. By extension, they knew who I was. I FIT IN! ...sort of. I guess I didn't want to give that up.

Fortunately for us all, high school ends. And that? Is when we TRULY find ourselves. When we don't have to worry about keeping up with the latest fads, the newest clothes, the what the crap ever. After high school, we get to breathe. To BE.

That's just my take on things. Feel free to share yours. I like the interaction. :)